Allow me to babble about something for a moment. It might be a little off topic, but sometimes that's OK.
I've noticed a few articles rolling around lately about being busy. Today, at least three of my friends shared this post from a year or so ago in the New York Times. The post is about, well, being busy and how it's a trap and how we easily fall into it.
There are parts about the article that I am not sure I agree with, but the article really made me think about my own life because I relate to most of the stuff the author is talking about. I tend to schedule out my day and pack a ton of things into it. I have been known to say no to friends because I have to work or write or do something. I don't usually blow my friends off or anything and I am pretty good at making plans, but I still say no sometimes. Even for a quick drink or something.
I tend to think the whole "I'm so busy" thing is an excuse. Sure we are busy sometimes, but not all the time and sometimes you just have to say no to things. I am guilty of it too and it's not always intentional, but I think it's a fall back sometimes. It's easy because people don't ask a lot of questions and there's not much you can do when someone says "I'm busy".
Side note: One of the articles I read was also about how people who are busy all the time are probably poorly managing their time. This could be true. I can't find the article again, but if I can then I will write more about that later.
I've always thought that there needs to be a balance between working/doing what you have to do, aka being "busy", and the rest of your life. And I feel like I am pretty good at it. Not always. I mean, there are some days that I work straight through and only eat a cracker for lunch. I could also spend more time with my friends, but when I am with them I am present. I am not secretly working in the background. I have also taken time totally away from everything to take trips with Mr. T and to see my family. I would also take trips with my friends, I just haven't lately. So, like I said, I feel like I am pretty good at it.
But, I would be lying if I didn't say that sometimes I feel guilty. Usually it's not so much when I am out with friends or Mr. T, but more when I am by myself. I almost always scold myself for sleeping in. I tend to feel guilty if I want to just sit on the couch and watch TV, take a couple hours to get a mani/pedi or massage, or just go for a walk. Actually, sometimes it makes me feel like I am being lazy and then I tend to feel bad about myself. Like somehow I am not allowed to just be lazy and take a break. And I think that's a huge part of the problem.
Some of the best times I have had have been when I just kind of relaxed and didn't worry about deadlines and schedules. I didn't worry about what I had to do. Just this past weekend is a perfect example. I had a gal’s night with @Lifesarunway, then Saturday we wandered around Brooklyn. Mr. T came over. We all made food, drank, and colored eggs. We spontaneously decided to make another trip to the tattoo place. We watched basketball and ate wings. Then, on Sunday Mr. T and I went to church and to brunch. We shopped through the thrift stores. We came home and took a two-hour nap. We watched basketball and our shows on TV.
It was a nice weekend. I didn't feel stressed or like I had a million things to do because I wasn't thinking about it. Those are always the best moments and the times that I feel the best about my life.
I guess the point of my babbling is, I think those moments are a pretty valuable part of life and it's an important thing to make them happen rather frequently. We've become a culture of get it done yesterday and respond immediately to everything. We work late hours. We work when we’re sick. And there's really no need to be like that all the time.
No good comes from over extending yourself and trying to do everything. Sure you should work hard and you shouldn't float through life like a lump of crap, but you need to have a balance. Having a life is important and you don't have to be busy all the time. Sometimes it’s OK to stop working, to be a little lazy, to have a little fun. And it’s OK to not feel guilty about it.